How We Deal With Chaos
Chaos comes in all shapes and sizes. And, Kelsey and I have very different ways of dealing with chaos in our daily lives. It's been top-of-mind for us the past four months as we've encountered the challenges of both of us transitioning jobs and all the changes that come within the first year of being parents. We've certainly approached the chaos differently and recently we discovered that neither of us is wrong; just different.
We each have different strengths and different personalities. While sometimes it causes conflict, if we seek to understand each other, these differences in personality can also compliment one another.
The Brick Wall
Everyone has a breaking point when it comes to stress and how we deal with it. Kelsey is really good at saying no to things when her stress level rises. Saying no is her way of keeping the chaos at bay. This usually means that we try not to accept too many extra events on the calendar.
Kelsey will spend time relaxing and create extra downtime for herself. She'll spend that time doing things she loves, like shopping online or catching up on blogs. She is really good at keeping a work-life balance. One of her strengths is harmony, and it definitely comes out in times of chaos.
I'm quite different in my approach to stress. I think I try to conquer it with might. Which, I'm finding, is probably not the best route to take sometimes. As I start the transition to my new job, my workload has been super crazy!
My solution to this problem is to work as furiously as I can to keep up with everything. Which means going into work extra early, scheduling lunch with friends during the week, completing a huge pallet wall project in the evenings, refinancing our house (again) and trying to find an investment professional to help us kick start baby steps four and five.
The stupid thing is that the pallet wall could have waited. Just like our landscaping project could have waited last year while Kelsey was dealing with her post-partum feelings. I'm not sure why I do this to myself, or to my family, but it's definitely something I'd like to work on.
Honestly, we've argued about this issue a lot lately. My going to work early leaves all of the morning baby duties to Kelsey. Luckily there is light at the end of the tunnel and we know that this transition will be for the better and won't last forever. But, next time our lives start to get chaotic, I hope we can handle it better.
How do you deal with chaos in your life?