6 Reasons I Know I Married the Right Person
For years I wondered if there was one - and only one - person out there for me. You know, the one. The romantic in me would like to think yes. I asked Eric and he thinks probably not. He thinks there are probably a number of people we are compatible with and would be happy with.
That sounds kind of anti-climactic to me. But maybe he's right. I've decided it doesn't really matter, because I was thinking about it the other day and I realized that I totally married the right person for me. Here's why:
- I never get sick of him. Eric is my best friend. The foundation of our love is authentic friendship - that's how it started. We love to be with each other and talk to each other. We realized the other day that we have been friends for 10 years. Ten years! That's a long time to hang out with someone. Still to this day we both swear we've never gotten sick of each other.
- He complements me. There is a lot of balance in our relationship that makes it work. Sure, sometimes it creates tension, but most of the time we are able to celebrate our differences and realize that we need each other. Eric's a spender, I'm a saver. He makes decisions with his head, I use my heart. He's very futuristic, I live in the present. He steals the sheet, I steal the comforter. He uses the big spoons, I like the little ones. He prefers to wash dishes, and I like to put away the clean ones. Neither of us is wrong, just different. And it works.
- We grow together. I am amazed that after 10 years (six of marriage) we have continued to grow along the same path, at nearly the same rate. We both try to make each day count and keep learning and becoming better people. We challenge each other to set goals and make realistic plans to reach them. We take classes, read books & blogs, and generally care a great deal about improving our lives on a daily basis.
- We agree on almost everything. I can't imagine how draining and discouraging it must be to disagree with your spouse on a regular basis. We have a friend who seems to disagree with his wife on almost everything, and it turns a simple decision into a heated discussion. It's not like that for us. We rarely have to deal with compromise or disagreement. Eric and I agree on baby names, vacation spots, TV shows, political candidates, music...we even use the same hair products. When we don't agree (on temperature or how to cook our eggs), it's so rare that we usually simply end the conversation by agreeing to disagree, and forget about it.
- Our personalities mesh well together. We're both laid back, and generally easy to get along with. While we have differences (see #2), we still agree on almost everything (#4) because we're middle-of-the-road people. We're particular about certain things, and we give each other control over those things (Eric cleans the bathroom, I decorate the house). Neither of us is a fighter or fueled by confrontation.
- No one else is going to love me when I get mad. OK, I stole that line from Taylor Swift. But it's true. Sometimes I am not easy to love, but he chooses to love me any way. He doesn't use it against me or threaten to leave. There is lots of forgiveness in our house. It is absolutely necessary for us. I think in marriage it can be way too easy to hold grudges. Marriage isn't easy for any couple, but we make sure to talk things out until we've reached the end of a discussion so we can prevent future messups. We're deeply committed to each other.
How do you know you married the right person?